From the Rev, January 27, 2016

from the rev

Dear Friends,

Have you ever been in a conversation with someone and suddenly realize they aren’t hearing a word you’re saying? I dare say we all have had that experience and, if we’re honest, we’ve been the guilty one. So, do you want to change the world today? Look at someone and really listen when they talk to you. That’s it. Looking at someone when you talk to them in a room full of other people is one of the easiest ways to change the world by loving people.

The other day I was halfway in a conversation with a new friend when I found my eyes wandering. What’s going on over there? Is there someone else I’d rather talk to? I wonder what they are talking about over there? I can’t wait to go talk to that other person. Whether we’re an extrovert or an introvert, we all do this.

It’s so subtle but I think how we respond to individual conversations in a big crowd is sometimes a great indication of whether we are leaning towards selfishness or selflessness. Most of us walk into huge rooms with one agenda… ME. Who will notice me? Who said hi to me? Who’s pursuing me? Who’s listening to me? Who noticed my outfit? My hair? My voice? Who noticed I wasn’t here last week? The thing is, when we aren’t really paying attention when someone’s talking, they can tell. And it is so hurtful and diminishing.

I suppose I understand why it’s hard for us to focus on anyone when we come in pre-loaded with those expectations. I get it. But can you imagine what would happen if we flipped the scripts?

What if we actually looked people in the eye? Like we cared.

What if we listened with our eyes? Nodded. Engaged. Asked questions.

What if we came into a room and asked…Who can I notice? Who can I say hi to? Who can I pursue? Who can I listen? Who’s outfit can I compliment? Who wasn’t here tonight?

What would happen if we did that?

I’ll tell you what would happen. We would be love. We would change someone’s life. I guarantee it. I’m not saying that to be dramatic. It’s true . If people walked away from talking to you feeling more loved than they did right before they talked to you, you will be a world changer.

Do you want to be a world changer? Well, here’s a great place to start. Next time you talk to someone in a room full of people, look at them and actually listen and really listen. Maybe you’ll have to stop and turn to them and say “OK, I’m sorry that I was distracted when you first started talking. Let’s start over.” Most people won’t mind if you hit the reset on your focus button. It’s not flashy and you won’t get a trophy or gold star, but you very well could be that little nudge that someone has been waiting for.

Give it a try today. You could change the world.

You are loved,